Sex, Lies and Videotape: Russian Prostitutes Sue Trump

Peeing Hookers Claim Reputation Damaged by Trump Affiliation

Three Russian women have filed a lawsuit in Moscow Superior Court against President Donald Trump charging that the disclosure of their relationship with the leader of the free world has been “bad for bl’adki business.”  Etush Ilyinishna, Levkina Filippovna and Svetlana Valentinovna  allege that the leak of their reported dalliance with Trump in 2013 has cost them “many rubles” and has led to their banishment from the Moscow Ritz Carlton.  Pressed for details on what happened in the presidential suite that evening, Ms. Ilyinishna only replied, “He is a khokhol with much small hands.”  The suit calls for the payment of one million rubles to the three women, coverage of the delinquent Ritz Carlton in-room movie charges, and an introduction to Secretary of State Rex Tillerson.