Crawford, TX (TDP) – Irish rock band U2 has announced that former U.S. President George W. Bush will be permanently joining the group for its next world tour and beyond. In an announcement from Bush’s Crawford, Texas ranch, U2 lead singer Bono welcomed the 43rd President to the band and said he looked forward to collaborating with the former leader of the free world on future projects. “It’s difficult to carry the burden for the well-being of the planet’s 7.5 billion people all by myself,” Bono declared. “The addition of ‘W’ will take a bit off my rather enormous plate.”
Questioned on how he could reconcile his political differences with the newest member of the band, Bono chose to focus on their similarities. “More than 11 million people are alive today thanks to this man’s creation of PEPFAR, the U.S. AIDS program that has been saving lives and preventing new HIV infections for over 10 years, with strong support from political leaders right, left, and center,” commented the leprechaun-like lead man for U2. “And with less than 1 million confirmed dead from the wars he started, well, I was never good at math, but that looks like a net gain to me.”
“I’m just thankful to find some meaningful work. There’s only so much painting I can do,” noted Bush, referring to his book of his paintings titled “Portraits of Courage,” a collection of stories, portraits and murals he painted to honor military veterans. “Besides, Laura would like me to get out of the house once in a while.”
U2’s new lineup of Bush, Bono, The Edge, Adam Clayton and Larry Muller Jr. will perform under the name ‘W-2’ in recognition of the original band, their newest member, and the enormous profits they hope to reap from touring.
The supergroup will next perform at a sold-out show at the Waco Civic Theater in Waco, Texas.